THE EPIC OF CODEFORCES

Правка en1, от farmersrice, 2019-08-08 19:01:57

For an entire 23 hours the world lost its shining gem: Codeforces. Just before the greatest site in the universe went down, I finally was finished with not-participating in the Educational Round 70 and made my last not-submission at not-contest time. I instinctively rushed to the greatest server of all time, the most shining pinnacle of pseudointellectualism: Proof by AC. Now was the time to make memes. Of course, this involves orzing many great and talented geniuses. (If you were unaware, it is a civic duty.) As a natural consequence, one must look at the friends' standings, to figure out how much to orz. Only logical, right?

But suddenly, while refreshing the almighty Friends Standings page (orz), DISASTER STRUCK!!!!!!!!!!

We encountered unknown technical issues, the website is temporarily unavailable. It is not yet possible to give any predictions when it will be repaired. Sorry about it.

For the rest of the day my mind was in agony as I was unable to access the greatest site in the universe, Codeforces. How else would I be able to fulfill my organic desire for pseudointellectualism and witty short comments? After all, upvotes are like the emotional currency of the mind. At night I tossed and turned, unable to think about the fact that the greatest site in the universe, Codeforces, might be encountered unknown technical issues, the website is temporarily unavailable. It is not yet possible to give any predictions when it will be repaired. Sorry about it.

In the night I had a miraculous vision. From the ashes of Codeforces would rise Codeforces 2.0. Never mind the fact that Codeforces was still in beta and hadn't even reached version 1 yet. CODEFORCES 2!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Sample logo:

Actually it was kind of like Lichess 2.0, in the fact that it looked cooler but was actually complete garbage. And also in this vision everyone's ratings were reset to 1500, except for the top 10 who got manually restored. Thankfully I am very bad at visions.

As I prepared to proceed with my day, already colored grey by the absence of the shining light of Codeforces, I went back to my computer after eating a long and tumultuous breakfast, my mind uneased by the trivialities of food. And I reopened my browser to encounter the familiar message from the greatest site in the universe, Codeforces. After posting "JUSTICE FOR CODEFORCES" a couple times in discord, I finally felt that my duty was fulfilled. Solidarity was shown. Cue Starship Troopers scene "I'm doing my part!".

Then, all of a sudden, an image pops up. "Educational Codeforces round 70, open hacking phase finished, final standings". IMPOSSIBLE!!!!!!!!! I check again, but the greatest site in the universe still shows the same old error message.

I refreshed and refreshed and refreshed, but nothing came up. Until finally, the greatest site in the universe returned before my eyes.

The room flooded with a brilliant white light. The entire city block cried out in unison, a resounding sound soon heard around the world. It was back. Humanity was saved. The Dark Ages 2.0 had finally come to an end as the bringer of light, the greatest site in the universe, had finally returned. CODEFORCES. Sitting in my room, papers strewn across the floor in moments of agony while the site was down, I was paralyzed with a feeling of pure overwhelming bliss as the photons streamed into my eyes, weeping tears of joy.

Now remains the only question: Where were you when codeforces back?

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en1 Английский farmersrice 2019-08-08 19:01:57 3667 Initial revision (published)